My family enjoys binge-watching shows together. A few years ago, we were totally hooked watching The Man In the High Castle on Amazon Prime. This show was a dystopian view of how the world would be if the Allied Forces lost WW2 to the Axis powers. One of the characters was a Japanese diplomat who lost his family during the war. I won’t spoil the entire plot for you, but at some point, in the show, he is reunited with his son and, during an argument, breaks a plate. He repairs the broken china with gold to make the flawed plate whole again, beautiful, and strong. This practice intrigued me as a crafter.
Kintsugi is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery pieces by using gold. This practice is built on the idea that the piece's flaws and imperfections are embraced and that after the repair, the pottery is an even stronger, more beautiful piece of art. What an amazing metaphor for the work we do in therapy!
How many of us have been broken at some point in our lives?
Traumas, break-ups, death of loved ones, loss of jobs, failure….all things that break our spirit.
We enter this world as whole beings. Then something happens to you that forms a crack. Some people experience more cracks than others. You might be someone who has been shattered into many smaller pieces.
You have a decision to make. Do you stay a broken mess, or do you start to glue yourself back together?
Therapy is that process. Together, with your therapist, you explore how these broken pieces go back together. Sometimes they fit perfectly without issue, but sometimes the edges might not line up exactly perfectly. Your brokenness has changed you forever. The gold on each crack serves as a reminder that your brokenness also makes you beautiful. Your story is unique. Your healing makes you stronger.
As I glued my bowl back together, I found that some little pieces were lost during the process leaving small holes in the bowl. I sometimes feel like I am missing a part of me, especially when dealing with my grief. I made sure to coat these holes with gold so that they were gilded and everyone would be able to notice that these holes were now a part of my bowl.
If you feel like you are broken, you can get help. I work with people who have experienced many different levels of trauma and distress. You can learn how to cope. You can learn how to heal. You can glue yourself back together and find beauty in your flaws.
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